Sunday 8 April 2018

What I wish I could tell my terrified pregnant self

My thoughts on becoming a first time mum one year on as my maternity leave finishes and I return to work

Whilst I absolutely love writing interior-related posts, once in a while I like to step away from which cushions I'm currently lusting after, or how I like to arrange my candles, and go a bit deeper (I previously blogged about why I was no longer scared to turn 30, and how I stay positive and motivated). I'm not massively into sharing my feelings, but like to push myself to be a bit more honest, so thought I'd share my thoughts on becoming a first-time mum, as my maternity leave sadly comes to an end and I'm due to return to work.

All the way through my pregnancy I was bombarded with 'horror stories' about labour ("You're too much of a wuss, you won't be able to have a water birth" is a GENUINE sentence somebody said to me), and how tough looking after a newborn would be. Maybe it was just the worrier in me, but in the run-up to my daughter's due date I felt utterly overwhelmed and frankly, absolutely TERRIFIED about what was about to happen to my life. I had no idea what to expect, and so therefore feared the worst.

I think unfortunately, the messages that soon-to-be mums receive often seem to focus on everything they're about to lose (sleep, social life, the ability to finish a cup of tea), that its easy to overlook all the things you're going to gain - most probably because its difficult to put it all into perspective before meeting your little bundle of joy.

Whilst I'm not saying its not hard work, and its not tough to lose all those things (seriously, having a spare 30 seconds to treat yourself to a wee is pure luxury!), I think, for me, the experience has been overwhelming wonderful (I was incredibly lucky to have a straightforward labour, so even found the birth a positive experience - although I wasn't saying that at the time!). Before I held her and looked at her beautiful little face, I found it difficult to comprehend genuinely not caring about the things I could no longer easily do.

I think what I'm trying to say is, that all the hard work, sleepless nights and having your life turned upside down is 100% worth it. In ways I could never have imagined. At the end of the day I couldn't care less that I've regularly answered the door to the postman in sick-covered pj's, that I've been awake since goodness knows when, or that when my husband asks me how my day was, all I've usually got to tell him is what happened on Judge Rinder - because when I catch a sight of that cheeky little smile I can't remember any of it anyway.

So I just wish I could go back to tell my start-of-mat-leave self, to stop worrying, know that you absolutely will be able to cope, and to nod and smile when bombarded with yet another horror story - because its not until you meet the best friend you'll ever have, that you'll finally understand what they mean when they say 'it'll all be worth it'.

Thanks for reading, 
Sam Xx


  1. Perfectly put! I was a little too confident that I would rock the birth and ace being a mum so didn’t listen to anyone telling me how hard it would be. Before reading your blog post I thought that was a bad thing, because I wasn’t prepared for the horrendous labour, and I certainly wasn’t prepared for how hard being a mum would be. However, after reading this, I realise that it actually was a good thing, yes it was all a bit of a shock, but I didn’t have anxiety over what I couldn’t change anyway! And you’re so right, it’s all worth it. Xxx

    1. Oh thanks so much for having a read, and I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Yes I agree, that sounds like a much better way to be, as my fear definitely ruined my pregnancy! It so is worth it isn't it - the things these bubbas put us through eh?! Thanks again for reading Xx


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